You are Enough

I come from a long history of not feeling as though I am enough....

With a previous relationship, I didn't fulfill his needs enough, I was just not enough.

Most recently, it was I didn't clean enough, I spent too much money, I didn't have enough in common, I was just not enough...

Last year was a doozy, I went through a couple surgeries, and the last one left me without fallopian tubes and one of my ovaries. After 7 years of on and off trying to conceive, this left me in a deep dark hole of depression and self doubt. I just was not enough...

I turned inward, wanting to be alone most of the time in my self doubt bubble. Honestly, I barely remember much of that dark time because I was just focusing on keeping my head above water. Still, just not enough...

My ex fell in love with his best friend... This is MY fault, I'm just not enough....

Then I remember the words of my closest friends... You are so STRONG, you are beautiful, you are treasured, you are appreciated, you are of value, you bring so much to this world...

This is NOT my fault, my 'short comings' are not a flaw, I don't owe anyone anything, my feelings are VALID, It's ok to cry and scream, It's ok to not be ok....

and most importantly...

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

Shine on you crazy diamond, shine on...